Where Does It All Go?

In trying to be more mindful, I have suddenly realized that I often have no idea where my resources are going while they are in the process of being depleted. It is only in the aftermath as I'm staring blankly at my ATM receipt at my bank balance or doing a double-take when I look at the time do I suddenly and desperately crave a breakdown of my spent personal capital. What is most striking to me is that while I have been trained to automatically evaluate financial decisions and ask "Is it worth the money?" I seem to lack even a moment of hesitation before throwing time or energy away.

Happily, it seems many principles of the business realm apply to time and energy as well. For example, gross and net. If I put bedtime off a couple hours, it may seem as if I've gained some time; however, the next day I will lose that time and then some as I will lack the energy and mental clarity to accomplish tasks in a small amount of time. Perhaps an even better axiom is "You have to have money to make money." Substitute time or energy for money and the proverb still holds true. With time, I have discovered that dedicating a few hours to plan meals, make an accurate grocery list, and shop carefully can save me several hours over the course of a week. In the case of energy, there is exercise, whereby forcing myself to expend the energy to peel my body off the sofa will paradoxically lead to having more energy overall.

While working, I must account for my time,energy, and progress to prove I am an asset to the company. This is usually done with many spreadsheets and the use of an electronic planner. But I don't do anything like this for my life and goals. Really, should I be surprised that I accomplish far more in my work life than in real life? Does that on some level mean I feel the company's needs and goals are more important than my own? Having stayed up until 2:00am a couple days ago to compile data for a meeting, it may. I want that to change.